Posts Tagged ‘destiny’

Too much thinking!

Wednesday, October 28th, 2009

I sit here wondering what it takes to get out of the rat race the majority of us seem to live in. There is so much of the world yet to be conquered, engineering to be admired and seeing some of it this weekend has made me wonder exactly what it is I need to do to achieve this. I feel this is a burning ambition inside me… Or is this normal of a human? I don’t know; all I do know is I refuse to let this slip for the rest of my life, I don’t want to look back and say I wish I had done that, not any more. Seeing so much from these great heights at tremendous speeds slips my mind into a trance.
I am missing a vital piece of my jigsaw to life, I know what I am, what I want, what I have; but that piece that puts ambitions and goals into reality is missing. I don’t see where or what I am going to be in 10, 20, 40 years time. Before long they will come and I need to do something now otherwise I will never be satisfied… or are we never satisfied anyway? How many times do we think the grass is greener when it really isn’t!
We all seem to be destined to buy a house, settle down, have kids, retire then live if we are still fit to do so.
Well by the time I will be able to retire there is a likely chance I won’t be fit to live, so is it really that important to get into the rat race of buying houses having kids? Although I love my creature comforts I am unsure if I am a settler. I know I need to settle with a female, but settle somewhere seems too laborious for the rest of my life, I couldn’t do it.
I admire what Christine has to say with regards to this matter and it stimulates the mind, but to a dangerous level maybe beyond my ability. She seems gifted in the sense that she appears to be able to say I am going to do that and manages it; does she work her socks off for it – maybe; just maybe that is where I lack stimulation; but that doesn’t seem possible – my ambitions are worthy of stimulation… So someone help me!